Image Credit: Naufal Muhammad Haiqal / Unsplash
There’s rarely a lack of desire or conviction when you start a new diet. Then the diet begins, and you start asking some questions only a person who hasn’t had carbs in a while will ask. If you’re trying to lose a few pounds, here’s 20 funny tweets about dieting that will make you feel a little better.
But you’ll still be hungry.
20 Funny Tweets About Dieting
I'm starving and I have a fridge full of healthy food and I don't want to eat any of it.
— Sean Lowe (@SeanLowe09) January 28, 2017
[watching a guy eat an entire pizza] no wonder he's fat
[me eating an entire pizza] I'll start my diet tomorrow
— LocomotivEric (@ericsshadow) February 26, 2016
I'll have a salad but on top of a burger with cheese
"So you want a cheeseburger?"
Yes but when you bring it to me say here's your salad
— DaddyJew (@DaddyJew) November 26, 2014
[17 minutes into diet]
I can't live like this.
— Lurkin' Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) February 24, 2016
I need to get in shape. If I was murdered right now my chalk outline would be a circle.
— Goats? (@Gooooats) February 29, 2016
I suspect that low-carb diets work not because they are healthier, but because without carbs I simply lose the will to eat.
— Anna Kendrick (@AnnaKendrick47) November 5, 2015
"I'll save half of this for later," I said. And we laughed and laughed.
— Amy Dillon (@amydillon) November 15, 2014
TRAINER: what are your diet and exercise goals?
ME: to do them
— mark (@TheCatWhisprer) February 17, 2016
I need a playlist for when I deeply consider going to the gym but then don't.
— Akilah Hughes (@AkilahObviously) July 2, 2015
Friend: I'm surprised to see you eating a salad.
Me: *empties bag of chocolate chips over it*
— Victoria Sofia (@Ideal_Victoria) February 24, 2016
I can't relate to anyone who uses the word "small" in front of the word "snack."
— Stabbatha Christy (@LoveNLunchmeat) February 24, 2016
I like going for runs at night because the added fear of being murdered really does wonders for my cardio.
— Kevin Farzad (@KevinFarzad) January 7, 2015
all this anxiety better be burning calories
— Woman (@AlexisGZall) February 2, 2017
I want to be thin, but I also want to eat everything.
*Considering tapeworms as a possible realistic weight loss plan*
— Sara Says Stop Scaring Me (@PetrickSara) December 11, 2015
— (@theofficenbc) August 24, 2017
I feel like a taco salad is the worst way to eat a taco, and yet, the best way to eat a salad.
— Not Mark (@NotMarkAllen) July 16, 2015
Me: We really need to start eating better.
Me: Wanna just have nachos for dinner?
— That Carly Girl (@thatcarlygirl) December 13, 2014
Trying to eat healthy is like trying to eat healthy
— Jake Paul (@jakepaul) January 31, 2017
Me: I need to lose my baby weight.
Diet coach: Awww, how old is your youngest?
— MomofTeen (@MomofTeen) May 12, 2015
I wanted to lose 10 pounds this year. Only 13 to go.
— Hippie girl Cheryl (@CherylCheryl94) April 14, 2015